The Sales Secret No One Talks About
Someone recently asked me what I wish more people understood about messaging.
Short answer? Messaging isn’t just copy. It’s how your business is experienced—in real time, across every touchpoint.
This post is a deep dive into what that really means. We’ll walk through the four foundations of strong messaging—what it is, how to build it, and why most experts completely miss the mark.
By the end, you’ll see how to turn your message into a system that sells without you constantly showing up to explain yourself.
Step 1: understanding messaging
Messaging is More Than Just Copy
Most people hear “messaging” and think copy—a sharper headline, stronger IG bio, maybe some website tweaks. But that’s just the surface.
Messaging is the story your business tells—whether you're in the room or not. It's:
→ The language you use
→ The way people talk about your work
→ The feeling your brand leaves behind
And it only works when it’s aligned across the board.
Lately, I’ve been dealing with some serious hip pain. Through recovery, what I've realized is that it’s not just my hip—the whole damn system is off! Tight quads. Tilted pelvis. Weak glutes. Slouched posture.
When one part misfires, it throws the whole system out of sync. (And don’t even get me started on what happens when you try to fix an isolated symptom instead of the entire system! 😣)
Messaging works the same way. It only takes one piece to be out of alignment—like a bad spark plug wrecking your whole engine. Or a weak glute torpedoing your posture, your gait, and your lower back.
That shows up in your business when:
You’re giving high-level advice to execs, but your website gives neighborhood association updates
You’re selling high-touch offers, but you’re getting DMs asking for $300 copy gigs
You’re booking rooms with power players, but your intro still sounds like “I hELp wOmEn…”
MISFIRES HURT YOUR WHOLE SYSTEM
These aren’t just miscommunications or inconsistencies. They’re misfires—and when your message misfires, dream clients won’t ask follow-up questions. They’ll assume you’re not for them—and move on.
If your messaging is out of alignment, you’ll feel it—just like I did with my hip. Your business won’t move the way it’s supposed to.
Next, we’ll break down what most messaging experts overlook—and how it can flip the switch from “meh” to “where do I pay?”
Step 2: Context Is Everything
Context & Timing in Sales Conversations
Sales experts love to gloss over the importance of context. But it’s an essential piece, because even when your whole messaging ecosystem is on point, bad timing still kills conversions.
A few years ago, someone sat through my full sales presentation…and then said, “you know, I would really like you to write one really great intro email for me!” (And then wanted to pay me on spec. I wish I were kidding.)
That didn’t happen because I needed better language and delivery in my presentation— even though that’s the first place people go. It’s really easy to mis-diagnose a context problem as a messaging problem.
Think It’s a Messaging Problem? It Might Be a Context Problem.
I once worked with a founder sending DMs to a list of leads that I made the mistake of assuming were qualified, if not at least lukewarm.
But they were ice-cold! They had no idea who we were. No idea why we were reaching out. No curiosity. No connection. No shared story. Just a (very) well-written message delivered into a void.
And even the best copy cannot fix that! Because messaging without context is like showing up to a first date in a wedding dress. The vibes might be immaculate—but the timing screams 🚩🚩!
4 reasons why context is everything in messaging:
1. Context tells the reader why now. If someone doesn’t understand the timing or relevance of your message, it doesn’t matter how good it is. Context makes a message feel grounded. Without it, it’s just noise.
2. Context shapes perception. The same exact offer can feel premium or sketchy depending on how it’s introduced. Are they seeing a testimonial about you from a trusted colleague? Or cold-pitched in a DM with no warm-up? 😬 Same words. Totally different impact.
3. Context builds trust. When someone feels like they’re joining a conversation that makes sense, they’re more open to connecting. That's the difference between:
“Hey, I saw your post about XYZ…is that something you talk about often?”
vs.
“Hey boss babe, wanna 10x your biz?”
4. Context is the missing link between brand + sales! Everyone talks about “authentic marketing” or “selling without being salesy.” But what actually bridges that gap? Context.
When your delivery, story, offer, and timing all align, the sale feels like a natural next step—not a push.
Step 3: how to engineer the Buying Environment
The best salespeople seem to innately understand how to gently steer conversations toward sales. But for many mission-driven entrepreneurs (and neurodivergent folks), engineering that kind of alignment can feel nearly impossible.
creating Context With Your Irresistible Buying Message
Call it a shameless plug if you want, but this is exactly why I created the Irresistible Buying Message™ (IBM). It doesn’t just sound good—it creates the context that converts!
The sneaky thing most experts don’t teach: Engineering Context—actually designing it so your message lands exactly how it’s supposed to, in the exact moment it matters.
You engineer context by dialing in four key things:
Framing – Why this matters right now
Sequencing – What they’ve heard before this
Positioning – Why you get to say it
Audience awareness – What they already believe (or need to unlearn)
When these click into place, your message doesn’t just sound good—it makes sense. That’s why Irresistible Buying Messages™ aren't just your answered prayer for awkward networking convos. They’re contextual. And context converts.
leading sales conversations
Here’s where a lot of mission-driven business owners get stuck. You see someone who would be a dream client. You know how you could help. You approach them, genuinely excited to share!
And then…you either overthink it, exhaust yourself, and end up never even talking to them, or you accidentally pitchslap them.
If you’ve been there, it’s ok! Bridging the gap between “I see you” and “here’s how I can help” is HARD. Especially for people who are intuitive, brilliant, neurodivergent—or all three.
Context-building is a skill. But it’s a heavy lift if:
✅ You’re great at seeing the big picture, spotting patterns, and knowing—deep in your bones—how you can help.
❌ But when it’s time to say it out loud, you freeze, because the how feels impossibly hard and your brain starts spinning.
How do you lead into it?
How much do they need to know?
How do you sell from the heart without having a nervous breakdown?
How do you make an offer without steamrolling someone’s boundaries or sounding like every pushy bro you hate?
It’s not that you don’t know your stuff. It’s that translating what you feel into something that makes sense—and gets consent—is a whole different skill set. One most of us were never taught.
That’s what the IBM system was built for. To externalize that process—so you’re not relying on memory, vibes, or psychic intuition to get your message across.
You don’t have to hope they “get it.”
You design it so the right people do.
Because messaging doesn’t work in a vacuum. It works when you set the stage—so your message actually lands.
And that’s exactly what the Irresistible Buying Message™️ does:
✔ Tells the right story
✔ Positioned for the right person
✔ At the right moment
That’s context. And that’s what converts.
If you’re ready to start creating context that converts right now? Grab the Irresistible Buying Message Bundle and get to it!
Step 4: Make it cohesive
Let’s get into the cake of it all!
Recently, my mom made a cake that was so good, I could not stop eating it. Like, had-to-give-some-away-or-I-would’ve-eaten-it-all good! My best friend (and her husband!) even texted me the next day to say how out of this world it really was.
No, it's not some fancy secret family recipe, or even that much of a labor of love. My mom simply followed all the steps for Italian Cream Cake. Like, the actual steps. As in, all of them. Including the annoying ones.
She let the eggs and butter come to room temperature. She sifted the flour.
She didn’t skip ahead or throw things in out of order.
And that’s what made the cake perfect! The texture? Unreal. It held together. It melted just right. It made sense.
Now, when I bake? I just start grabbing things out of the fridge, throw them into the KitchenAid, and let Jesus take the paddle attachment.
Then I complain that the texture’s off or it's too dry, which is always definitely the recipe's fault. (How dare!) So, I go looking for a better recipe—when the truth is, I didn’t even follow the one I had.
Most People Skip The Steps That Lead to Cohesion
My cakes suck because I skip the steps that led to cohesion. And it’s the same with your messaging.
You can have incredible copy. A killer offer. A powerful story.
But if those pieces aren’t working together?
→ People get confused
→ Sales feel unpredictable
→ You end up tweaking your copy over and over—when what actually needs attention is how the whole system fits together.
Cohesion means your messaging doesn’t just look good online. It tracks—in a DM, on a panel, in your IG bio, and when someone asks what you do while you're balancing a drink and a mini crab cake in one hand.
And it communicates who you are, how you help, and why it matters without you constantly explaining it from scratch. When that happens?
→ It’s easier to sell without shape-shifting
→ Easier to scale without starting over
→ Easier for the right people to say YES
Because people aren’t buying your words. They’re buying your clarity, confidence, and consistency. And when those come through in your message, it’s magnetic!
is your messaging working together?
All of this is why I don’t just review your copy in a Messaging Audit—I look at your whole ecosystem:
✔ Your social profiles
✔ Your website
✔ Your emails (if you have them)
✔ And how you show up in real time—your intros, DMs, sales convos, and more
Then I give you no-fluff, high-context feedback to help your message click into place—so your words match the level you’re already operating at.
👉 Book your Messaging Audit here
Want a lower-lift way to start? Grab the Irresistible Buying Message™ Bundle and start building messaging that makes sense now, with help from the AI tool that walks you through creating your Buying Message!
Because your business isn’t underbaked. It’s just missing cohesion. Let’s fix it so your message holds up as well as my mom’s cake!